Thursday, January 26, 2012
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Monday, January 23, 2012
An old Italian man and his wife were having dinner at a very fine restaurant when this absolutely stunning young woman comes over to their table, gives the husband a big open-mouthed kiss, then says she'll see him later and walks away. ... The wife glares at her husband and says, "Who was that?" "Oh," replies the husband, "she's my mistress." "Well, that's the last straw," says the wife. "I've had enough, I want a divorce!" "I can understand that," replies her husband, "but remember, if we get a divorce it will mean no more shopping trips to Paris, no more wintering in Barbados, no more summers in Tuscany, no more Jaguar in the garage and no more yacht club. No more credit card and large Bank accounts. But... The decision is all yours." Just then, a mutual friend enters the restaurant with a gorgeous babe on his arm. "Who's that woman with Tony?" asks the wife. "That's his mistress," says her husband. "Ours is prettier," she replies.
Friday, January 20, 2012
Sunday, January 8, 2012
Old Age
An Old man went to the doctor complaining of a terrible pain in his leg. “I am afraid it’s just old age”, replied the doctor, “there is nothing we can do about it.” “That can’t be” fumed the old man, “you don’t know what you are doing.” “How can you possibly know I am wrong?” countered the doctor. “Well it’s quite obvious,” the old man replied, “my other leg is fine, and it’s the exact same age!”
Thursday, January 5, 2012
Two Old Lawyers
Two old lawyers had been stranded on a desert island 30 years. The only thing on the island was a tall coconut tree that provided them their only food. Each day one of the old lawyers would climb to the top to see if he could spot a rescue boat coming. One day the lawyer yelled down from the tree, "WOW, I just can't believe my eyes. There is a woman out there floating in our direction." The old lawyer on the ground was most skeptical and said, "You're hallucinating, you've finally lost your mind." But within a few minutes, up to the beach floated a stunningly beautiful woman, face up, totally naked, unconscious, without even so much as a ring or earrings on her person. The two old lawyers went down to the water, dragged her up on the beach and discovered, yes, she was alive, warm and breathing. One said to the other, "You know, we've been on this God forsaken island for years now without a woman. It's been such a long, long time... So ... Do you think we should... well... You know... Screw her?" "Out of WHAT?!?" asked the other old lawyer.
Sunday, January 1, 2012
Friday, December 30, 2011
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
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